Sunday, September 28, 2008

How I Wish I Should Never Be Needed To Talk About My Kevin!

They store the umbilical cord tissues in glass jars in what can be called human banks (i m sure they cal it by someother name which i am unable to recollect!).
If my baby develops any disease then he may be miraculously cured as the frozen tissue stays safe in the bank at a pecuniary cost.
Thats technology. Thats science. As a lawyer-to-be I can only marvel at the thought of it. But what about the uncurable things? Will that umblical cord extract my child brighter, 'taller, stronger and sharper'?

Being a woman (context forces me to use this term in stead of girl) and that too a cancerian, maternity flows in my blood. There is a favourite memory i share with my best friend from school, at 12 she used to say i want a puppy being a dog lover and i used to say i want a baby! That being so, now that i am, very practically viewing, less than a decade away from marriage and maternity, i often get fascinated about how my kids will be and how they shall grow up to be.

And one fine day i come across a book by Lionel Shriver named 'We Need to Talk About Kevin'. A fear seeped in to my joys of anticipatory maternity. The kid, Kevin, in the movie at 15 shoots a bunch of his schoolmates and a teacher and as he serves detention, his mother grieves and writes a series of emotional letters to her estranged husband. She recollects in them how Kevin was ruthless as a child and showed cruel intentions as he mauled insects. I managed to read several reviews for the book, although i m yet to read the book.

My love for kids definitely is much more than my longing to become a mother. I have a niche in my sympathy zone for all the kids, irrespective their delinquency or not. Kids are cute, no matter what. But this indifferent love for children vanishes somewhere, selfishly rather, when i think of my child being a delinquent. The thought of my son doing a classroom shootout is horrific. Not that I will start loving my child lesser, not that i will be ashamed of him, but is n't it like picking the best apples from the mart, just that we don't have kid marts and thankfully so. Its the same way like u r ok with homosexual relations but the minute your daughter tells u she has a girlfriend she would like to marry may be, you are all uncomfortable and furious. It might sound so irrational but i would not hate to admit that as my heart goes out to all the kids in the world- blacks white, brights dulls, creatives, geeks, delinquents, champs, i would pick up for my child a set of positives, an assorted virtue basket- smart, cute, genius, creative, obedient, lovable. Inconsistency, yes it is there. Duality too. But I m human n i don't feel ashamed to ask the best for myself, my child.

Sigh...I m already looking forward to become a proud mother at a parent teacher meeting! At times I wish i was not so ahead of age and behind times.....

PS: A special word of thanks to my proof reader. :)

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